We get fuckloads of questions here at Tokenicide (not really), so many in fact that it’s becoming a full-time job just to answer them (if by full-time you mean “non-existent”) so in the interest of efficiency (actually just to make us feel more important than we are) we’ve collected the most frequently assed (🍑) questions (all of which we made up ourselves since no one has actually assed (🍑) us anything yet) so you can stop bothering us (please please bother us) because we’re really busy and shit (we wish).
Q: Hi Tokenicide! What the fuck do you guys do?
A: We review ICOs using our Honest AF ICO Rating System and occasionally shitpost on our blog when we see or hear something going on in the ICO space that pisses us off so much that the only way to keep from committing a criminal act is to vent our anger in a public forum.
With lots of superfluous profanity thrown in for good measure.
Oh yeah, and fuck you too.
Q: I think your review of XYZ ICO is unfair and would request that it be taken down immediately. Who do I contact about that?
A: We make every effort to ensure that the reviews we post on Tokenicide adhere to the highest standards of our Honest AF ICO Rating System.
If for some reason you still disagree with one of our reviews, we offer our sincerest apologizes and encourage you to file a complaint with our Department of No Fucks Given (“DoNFG”) and see where that gets you.
Q: Why do your ratings only go up to “not terrible?”
A: Because despite all of the incredible possibilities that blockchain and distributed ledger technology have to offer, they are still relatively new technologies that have significant practical limitations in their current implementation.
In other words, anything higher than “not terrible” would be complete and utter speculative bullshit.
If this bothers you, and you would rather be offered piles of shit sandwiches disguised as gourmet fare, there are lots of other so called “ICO review” sites that have managed to turn that into an (extremely lucrative) art form.
But that’s not how we roll. In fact, it’s the whole reason we decided to launch Tokenicide in the first place. Deal.
Q: Is it possible to advertise my ICO on your website?
A: LOL 😂
Seriously, though, we currently have a no advertisement policy because as can be seen with virtually every other ICO review site out there, once money enters the equation, reviewers’ objectivity and integrity go out the window faster than a crack pipe the moment you spot the po po doing a U-turn in your side view (hypothetically speaking of course).
If we ended up prostituting ourselves like all the other ICO review sites out there, it would defeat the whole purpose of what we’re trying to do with this site. Other than allowing us to curse in a public forum, of course.
We fucking love to do that shit.
But integrity is good too.
Got a question that’s not listed here? Send that shit to us via the emails at firstname.lastname@example.org.